Time to Stand Up and Be Proud

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."  ~Dr. Seuss

I liked this quote for what our lessons were this week of standing up to peer pressure and standing up for yourself as a girl on the run.

The girls are amazing.  I think it's time to say it, I have the best team ever. I know that is so biased but really, I do have the best group of girls both former team mates and current ones.

Monday we changed up our workout routine.  So many of the girls, more than half of them had run the 5k race for their school fundraiser on Sunday.  I had so much empathy for them because my own legs were in searing pain.  It hurt to walk.  It's a sad day though when it makes you feel better to hear a bunch of 8-10 year olds say how sore they are too.  Just so that I knew it wasn't just me!

So out into the 90 degree day....wait, what?  90 DEGREES!!!!  Hi, its only April and it was just 50 degrees a couple of days ago.  ::Sigh::  Mother nature, well played.  Of course the day you give us a searing hot day the girls don't have water with them it seems like.  SUPER FAIL!

Its ok, I already have a back up plan, we will just run anyways!  *Evil laughter ensues....oh, wait, these are kids, right...ok, rethink lesson.

So today we changed things. I love the GotR curriculum but have found one major flaw.  The girls are hyper and crazy when they get out of class. They have less focus.  So today we went outside and drilled for about 30 minutes in the shade and then stretched.  Then headed indoors to work on our lesson.  The amount of focus that the girls had was amazing. I had 15 little girls that I split into 5 teams of 3 and they worked in their groups for the first time ever with little to no argument.  Actually the only argument that happened was one girl with me wanting to be in a particular group and I said no, she needed to get to know her other teammates better.  She accepted this as a great answer.

So the girls talked about peer pressure.  Last season this was a hard lesson for me because the examples they want us to use are smoking/drugs.  These are elementary school kids and very few of them have had exposure to that from their peers.  So this season after watching and listening to my daughter's own plights I was able to get them to focus on the pressures they face to act a certain way, to dress a certain way or like certain things and not let others know what they really like because they can be made fun of for it.  Excellent, the girls are amazing.

Did you know how much you can learn as an adult from kids!  I have on particular girl who over the seasons I think has struggled to feel like a part of the group and even more so to feel proud/confident in herself to be part of the team or trust the coaches.  After two seasons with me I have seen a huge difference in her attitude from being a bit sullen and loner to her trying to be a leader and she really opened up during this lesson.  And then watching another girl who is often so quiet during some practices and it took a lot for me to accept that she is ok, just needs her space some day (I find this happens with kids who have younger siblings) and she nominated someone for an energy award-herself.  I about fell over-she nominated herself for just being awesome.  I left this practice with one of the biggest smiles on my face I have had in a long time.  The girls have come so far.

And then Thursday...what would I come in to see other than...

The girls lined up outside the classroom waiting patiently for an adult to show up!  um, ok...wow.  First time there wasn't a teacher in the room, my personal savior some days Ms Loughry. (<i>Oh yes, I call her out by name because this woman has to be one of the girls' biggest fans and she has very often saved me when I have cut it close by getting the girls to be ready when I walk in the door-words cannot express just how much I appreciate the support of the parents and teachers at this school</i>)She wasn't there and the girls followed instructions, no one is to enter without an adult.  *Happy dance

And I can go on forever about how great the girls were today.  They followed suit with Monday's behavior even with so many special guests.  But I want to bring up why this day's lesson means so much to me.  We learned the phrases
I Feel__, When you __, Because __, I would like ___.

And one of my special guests is the little sister of a former teammate who has joined the newly formed team at her school. I couldn't believe of all the days they got to come and surprise me that it was this day!  The youngest of our little participants last season, as their mother was my go to parent who came so often to practices when a coach couldn't make it and I pretty much voluntold her to be a coach for her daughters' school, was the reason I realized I was actually making a difference in these children's lives.

Her story-She was at a party dressed as her favorite character, Elmo.  Another little girl was making fun of her saying that Elmo was for babies.  This really upset the little girl and she had just attended out lesson about standing up for herself. She approached her peer and said very respectfully, "I fell badly, when you make fun of me, Because it hurts my feelings, I would like for you to please not make fun of me."

I could have cared less what the outcome was at that point, even though it turns out the bullying girl actually apologized.  What brings me back as a coach, even when I think of all the stress, anxiety, or time this takes in my life, was knowing that at that moment I had changed one girl's life.  That she had found the words to stand up for herself and that those words, while part of the plan, were something I had been able to teach her.

So having her show up on the day where I got to teach this lesson again, my heart soared to have her share her story with the team.  And they definitely took it to heart that this could really be something that could help them.

My lesson to any readers out there, is never stop believing that your actions and lessons that you try to teach your children are being ignored.  Cause somewhere in all that madness and energy that makes up your children, they are absorbing so much.