Writer's Block

Yeah, I know I know...I am not some official writer. Shoot, I am lucky that I have a handful of followers on my blog.  I mean, it is long winded, self serving to write about your life and hope that people want to read it and actually enjoy the words you put out there.

Oh cruel world, how I bare my soul to you and reap no rewards. 

Ha...ok, back to our program.

So 9 days left, and I am...petrified.  As each day to my first Triathlon competition brings me closer to the event, I get more and more nervous.  I have a crud in my belly that won't go away.  I know what I want, I want to do well.  I want to know that I go into this event with all my money raised for these kids.  And...I want world peace.

ok, forgoing world peace, because then I might actually be out of a job, I will settle for a big glass of margarita and some chips and salsa on the side.

So over the past week I have been 'slowing down'.  In other words, less gym time, more endurance training and stretching.  It sucks when you go running though with only two weeks left and you roll your ankle under you over a pine cone.  Or when every time you try to get into a pool, there is a freak thunderstorm closing the pools down (both indoors and out!).  Or you get done with a great workout of biking/running only to realize that you are not only suffering the effects of dehydration but wait, what is that pain....?  Oh, the beginnings of shin splints. 

No big deal. 

Achy knees, dehydration, slightly sprained ankle, and the beginnings of shin splints.  This is just a normal day in the running life of Jillianne.  Yeppers! 

But proactive is set in, I take my NSAIDS, drinking tons of fluids, taking my daily vitamin, staying away from the sick people, massaging my legs with enough bengay that the old men at the nursing homes should be jealous and now-I am doing what I tell others never to do.  Introducing something new into my exercise. 

Rock Tape.  It gets delivered this afternoon.  I am hesitant to believe it is truly the miracle it claims to be.  But at this point I a mildly desperate.  I mean, between two bad knees, two bad shins, and now a bad ankle-I gotta do it. 

I tell people not to try to make big changes to what they know less than two weeks out of their event.  Its good practice usually because people make big changes and they get injured so often.

But the pain that is shooting through my legs, even when I am just sitting at my desk at work, has become almost unbearable in the past couple of days.

You see, Runners, we are a strange breed.  We formulate traditions, patterns and we don't change things drastically.  It takes us time to accept that change is ok.  I get a pair of shoes, and I will live with them for years before considering a new brand.  Often I wont even change brands or styles for that matter until they discontinue it.  I have a rule about not wearing jewelry for racing.  It took me till I was 28 years old before I could run with a pair of sunglasses.  I was 27 before I changed from all cotton running gear to a more athletic/breathable material. I was 29 before I realized that running in tight compression gear was actually advantageous. It took me 9 years to go see a physical therapist to treat my knee injuries.

You get the drift, right?

And you wonder, what prompted me to consider throwing myself a curve ball so close to game time?  One word, "KIDS!"

I promised myself I would do my absolute best for these kids.  I know to everyone else, maybe it is impressive that I am going to complete a Triathlon.  But for me, it is more impressive to literally leave it all out on the playing field.  And I have been giving it my all.  I want to achieve something I never could have thought possible and make a good show in my division AND try to finish in two hours (I am excluding transition times for this because I am sure I will crash in the transition zone when i get off my bike.  I feel sorry for those ladies when I try running out of there with legs like lead!)

But I can't wait to start coaching this fall and seeing all those little girls and showing them pictures of what their coach did for them. Faced my fears, overcame the impossible, and worked hard the whole way through. 

I can't wait, for them to be proud to have me as their coach, as I am proud of them for coming out to practices every day and completing a 5k and improving their own personal lives.

It's time, to see if I can push through these final obstacles and overcome the pain.  The thing is, I know I can.